When Flying Blind, Trust There's Someone to Help Guide You
by SkyChasingDreamer
Summary: Tsukuyo and Gintoki are in an argument about something, but Tsukuyo has made her decision and doesn't know the best way to let Gintoki know. I'm sorry I'm shit at summaries. IT'S REALLY CUTE OKAY. GinTsu.


**Title**: When Flying Blind, Trust There's Someone to Help Guide You

**Pairing**: Gintoki/Tsukuyo

**Rating**: M

**For**: Kihentai!

**Disclaimer**: No

**When Flying Blind, Trust There's Someone to Help Guide You**

Tsukuyo walks into Kabukichou and heads down a familiar road to the Yorozuya apartment. She's nervous, but excited and so walks a little faster. She eyes people she passes, but doesn't give them much mind since she has someplace sh'ed much rather be. Reaching the stairs of the apartment, she ascends and hears laughter the second her foot touches the landing. The door is unlocked, as usual, so she lets herself in and Kagura's laughter gets louder.

"Tsukky! Look, Aki, it's your mama!"

There's a little smile on her face the moment she sees her little nine month old in his high chair. Small, pudgy arms reach out for her and she scoops him up to give him a hug. Akihiko wriggles and coos at her and she doesn't care that there's little bits of mashed peas on one of his cheeks.

"Still a messy eater, I see," she says and takes a napkin that Kagura hands her.

"Very messy! And fussy! I had to fight to get him to eat half his serving."

"And where's that no good father of his?"

Kagura sweeps her long hair over her shoulder. "Gin-chan got called out, he wasn't happy about it." Tsukuyo hums and kisses Akihiko's cheek once it's clean. "Are... you two still fighting?"

"Yes."

"You haven't told me what he did this time."

"I would if I could, but this one is between me and him."

"So... it's not that Gin-chan did something stupid?"

"Not exactly, no."

Kagura makes a face. "Bleh, relationship stuff."

Tsukuyo doesn't feel so out of place holding him anymore, he feels just right in her arms. It'd been bad in the beginning, but there's no doubts how much she loves her son, the only doubts she has is in her own abilities as a mother. It's a sore spot for her and something she genuinely struggles with, but she puts her all into it. One of her fears is that she'll come off as a cold mother because she isn't very good at being open with her affection, physically or using words, both are difficult for her. Gintoki has been her biggest support and has always encouraged her and helped her when her own worries start to get to her. It has definitely been a journey of life and self-discovery and she can safely say that she has found happiness despite all the ups and downs.

She puts Akihiko back in his high chair and brushes his soft little golden curls back with her fingers. "You need to eat a little more, mister."

"Good luck," Kagura grumbles.

"How's Okita-kun doing?"

"Who's that? I dunno anyone by that name, nope."

Tsukuyo rolls her eyes. "Denial isn't going to last, you know."

"Are you speaking from first hand experience?"

"N-no! It's just c-common sense!"

"Uh-huh."

"Brat!"

Taking the half empty food jar, Tsukuyo ducks her head to hide her flaming cheeks behind her bangs. Feeding Akihiko has never been an easy thing, not for anyone... except Gintoki. He's a master of it and Tsukuyo can't fathom why other than that he makes more sound effects than anyone else.

"Tsukky?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you going to be moving here?"

"No, that arrangement isn't changing yet." As it is, Tsukuyo has her duties in Yoshiwara and Gintoki has his duties here in Kabukichou, it makes more sense for them to keep going as they are since the two places aren't that far apart. Half the time Akihiko comes to Yoshiwara and stays, the other half of the time he stays in Kabukichou, and he's not neglected at all in either place. He's actually spoiled rotten and doted on maybe even a little too much... but then, there's no such thing as too much when it comes to her son, he deserves every bit of affections given to him. "Our argument isn't about that. You're never going to guess it, so don't try."

Kagura crosses her arms and pouts. "You never usually keep me out of it! You're always quick to vent about what Gin-chan did to piss you off!"

Tsukuyo sighed. "He didn't exactly do anything wrong this time. I promise I'll tell you when we've cleared it up, okay?"

"Okay," Kagura agreed and Tsukuyo knew she was just worried, she didn't typically fight with Gintoki for this long.

Sometimes their fights can last for a few days, but longer than a week is rare. They have their little disagreements on the daily, but those are... sort of more fun than anything. Playful, really. This is a serious fight they have going on, but Tsukuyo has every intention of putting an end to it tonight – that's what she's so nervous about. Akihiko refuses another bite and Tsukuyo is quick to get frustrated, she never has had an aptitude for patience. She does her best to keep herself in check since her son has proven to be surprisingly perceptive at his young age and picks up on emotions faster than some adults even can.

"Maybe he just doesn't like peas," Kagura supplies. "He eats other mashed vegetables pretty okay."

"No, he doesn't." Tsukuyo uses another napkin to wipe his chin. "I have a hunch," she looks back at Kagura, making eye contact, "and a legitimate fear about it."

"Huh? What do you think?"

"Sweets."

Kagura understands right away and she laughs. "I don't know if him inheriting Gin-chan's obsession with sweets should be a fear! It's innocent!"

"Gintoki's bad enough! But what if I have a big child and an actual child both demanding sweets? I'll lose my mind!"

Kagura laughs and it's a pleasant sound, she has grown into a wonderful young lady. She's filled out and spry, though she eats more than she used to and Tsukuyo hadn't thought that physically possible. She's living proof that Gintoki raises great kids and Shinpachi is no exception to that assessment either. The sound of the door sliding open makes Tsukuyo's heart jump and it's out of habit and need that she runs a hand through his bangs and consciously makes sure her expression is how she wants it to be.

"Welcome back!" Kagura calls happily – she's always happy to see him.

"Yo!"

Gintoki comes through the doorway from the hall and even now, Tsukuyo's gut flip flops. She won't call the feeling butterflies or any such nonsense, but she's not unhappy to see him. Akihiko, upon seeing his father, has turned into a giggling mess of grabby hands. He's reaching out and making grabbing motions with his fingers, heedless of anything else around him. This is his usual reaction to seeing Gintoki and Tsukuyo has a strong suspicious that it's some kind of sugar thing.

"Where were you?"

"It's good to see you too," he replies and kisses the top of her head before picking Akihiko up and lifting him up high. "And here's my big guy! Even bigger than the last time I saw you!"

Tsukuyo doesn't want to admit that watching Gintoki with their son gets her every fucking time, but... who's she kidding? It gets her _every_ fucking time. Gintoki's just so open about his adoration of him and he's so devoted, even when he's being a lazy slob. Tsukuyo doesn't know how he does it, but he's a great dad and somehow, even manages to be a fairly decent spouse. Akihiko laughs as Gintoki brings him in and rubs their noses together and Tsukuyo's heart just _pounds_.

There's a stab of guilt, too. Akihiko hadn't been planned and she'd had all these pent up anxieties that she wouldn't be able to work, that she wouldn't be able to love him right, that she'd subconsciously blame him if she couldn't go back to work to protect what's important to her in Yoshiwara. But all of that anxiousness that had made her so scared melted away when Gintoki held him for the first time.

That's a moment she's never going to forget.

Seeing the two of them together, how happy Gintoki was and still is, she knew she was ready to die for them if it ever came to that. Her love for Akihiko is fierce even though she may be brusque and she's proud of herself for that. Though, it's definitely Gintoki that lays on a majority of the physical affection, he's never shy about that stuff the way Tsukuyo is. She used to find it somewhat disconcerting that Akihiko has her eyes, but now she just thinks he's beautiful. She hopes he got the best of both of them, but so far it's hard to tell. If he really got the sugar gene, then he's not off to a very good start in the luck department.

"Oh, Ka-chan?"

"What?"

"I do believe a fellow sadist of mine is hovering outside the apartment. He isn't waiting for me, so... maybe go deal with that? I'm not taking in anymore strays."

"But Sadaharu isn't making any noise."

"He tamed the beast with food."

"That asshole!" Kagura hisses with a glare toward the door.

"Ah! Language! Watch your mouth, there's a baby here!"

"As if he can understand me! Ha!" She trotted over and gave Akihiko a kiss on the cheek before heading out calling over her shoulder, "Bye, Tsukky! Later, old man!"

"I'm not old," Gintoki pouts and looks to Akihiko who's perched against his hip, "am I? No, the hero of the story is never old."

"He's not eating very much."

"I fed him over half a jar before I left," Gintoki replies and hikes Akihiko up a little higher. "Told Ka-chan to only feed him until he doesn't want anymore."

"Ah, that explains it, she must've forgotten to mention that part to me."

"Well, she has been distracted lately." Tsukuyo makes a sound of agreement, it's no secret how invested she has become in one, Okita Sougo. "I had to pick up some money from that client the other day, guy finally got all his stuff in order."

"I just got here myself."

"Hungry?"

"No, I've eaten."

"Me, too. Wanna put him down or do you want me to?"

"You can."

Gintoki nods and heads off to the crib with the goofy little smile he always has on his face when he's with Akihiko. When they're gone into Gintoki's room, Tsukuyo starts mentally preparing herself for the conversation to come. She knows she's going to flush – fuck! She's already flushing! She needs to stop that! Fanning her face with a hand, she reaches for her pipe, then cusses softly because it's not there. She doesn't make a habit of carrying it around with her when she's with her son, she fears he'll smell the smoke or something. She's extra precautious around him and extra protective, but so is Gintoki, so they balance each other out well.

She takes a few deep breaths and jumps when Gintoki says, "Come say g'night!"

Running her hands over the front of her clothes, she goes to the bedroom and smiles down at their little bundle wrapped up his light yellow onesie. He's already mostly asleep, his eyelids dropping nearly all the way shut and when Gintoki kisses the top of his head, his eyes close all the way. Tsukuyo touches his soft, soft hair again and whispers her goodnight to him, wishing him sweet dreams and a restful night. She doesn't jolt when Gintoki slips an arm around her waist and still has a smile on her face as they leave the room. But when the door quietly slides shut, all her nervousness comes back in full. What's worse, she's powerless as Gintoki turns her toward him and lifts her face with a hand on her chin.

"Hi," he says and does that really stupid thing – he kisses her. His other arm wraps tighter around her waist, his palm flat against her lower back to press her closer to him and she doesn't pull back. "You still mad at me?"

She turns her head with enough force to lose the grip of his hand. "No."

"No?" He actually sounds confused and both arms go around her. "Meaning...?"

This is it, this is the moment she's both dreading and looking forward to in a way. See, Tsukuyo had never seen herself having any kids, though Gintoki hadn't known that before Akihiko. On the other hand, Gintoki wants more than one kid and that's where their argument stems from. Tsukuyo is fine with one and Gintoki wants more, _but_...

"O-okay."

She's not looking at him, but she feels him freeze. "Okay?"

Tsukuyo's face heats up and she snaps, "I s-said okay! What more do you want? Okay means o-okay!"

Gintoki grabs the back of her head and turns it so he can kiss her. Over and over again he kisses her and she can keep his smile against her lips. He kisses her so many times that he starts dipping her, leaning her back until he's supporting most of her weight. They're chaste kisses that steadily get a little longer, all of them leading up to one big one that leaves her breathes with her arms around his neck even though she knows he won't drop her.

"How many more?" Gintoki asks eagerly, pulling her back up and to him to right her on her feet.

She knows her blush is bright, but she can't fight it off. "Just one more... t-to start."

Gintoki laughs and picks her up, carrying her to the nearest sofa. "We could have another boy." She gently lays her down and slides himself between her legs on top of her. She's ready for him to kiss her this time and hooks a leg over his hip to keep him close. "Or a little girl," he whispers against her lips and it makes her shudder before he's kissing her again. "Maybe even twins."

Tsukuyo yanks on his hair. "Don't push it!"

"I can't control that!" She can feel his cock pressing against her thigh and it doesn't surprise her that he's already more than half-hard. "Though imagine if we had quadruplets!"

Her face can't get anymore red. "If you're w-wanting to put me in the mood, you're n-not doing a very good job, moron."

Gintoki grins. "I can fix that."

He kisses her long and deep, his tongue working into her mouth and one of his hands cups her cheek. The weight of him presses down on top of her, covering her, and she likes the feeling, has always liked it. His hands start touching her, moving at an unhurried pace and skimming along her exposed skin like an unfair tease. A hand cups her breast and gives it a gentle squeeze until she moans into his mouth and tightens her legs around him. He's too fucking good at this and knows her weak spots, it hadn't taken him long to find them out.

"Our family's gonna get bigger," he says as he kisses down her neck and she moans.

A family with Gintoki, that's why this decision got easy for her. She loves Gintoki, she loves Akihiko, and she'll love any children she has with this man with the same raw ferocity. She has a _good_ man, the best one she has ever known and will ever know, she's so damn lucky to have him.

"O-oh!" Tsukuyo cries and puts a hand over her mouth to keep herself quiet so as not to wake the baby.

One of Gintoki's hands has slid between her legs to touch her where she's most sensitive and even though he's only touching the outside of her clothes, she's wet for him. He's just going to keep playing with her, keep making her want more and more until she can't stand it. She can feel a smirk against her neck and she tightens her grip on his hair, then tugs him up for more of his kisses.

No matter what they might face in the future, she knows that if Gintoki is by her side, they can face anything together – even more kids.

**The End**


End file.
